Question by Susan Storm: My old pastor says he “used” to be an alcoholic. I don’t think there is such a thing is there?
I speak from experience b/c my late father was an alcoholic.I spent years watching my mother pick himself off the ground (many times) him later going to AA meetings & staying sober for almost a year before falling of the wagon when my “gram” died. (Yes that was my nickname for grandma!) Last year he died from complications from hepatitis but I know it was induced by the booze. He would drink beer @ breakfast, lunch and dinner & would drive with an open container all the time.
I went to some AA meetings when I noticed I was drinking a 12 pack a day everyday after work & thought I might have a problem. I won’t say what I have substittuted in place of booze. I’ll just say it’s non-toxic.I know I am predispoed to having an addictive personality since my father was an alcoholic & my mother has a slight gambling problem that has left her bankrput.
I learned there is no such thing as “used to be an alcoholic” .It’s like addiction. Once an addict you’re still an addict. Even if you’ve gone to treatment & worked the 12 steps you’re still a “recovering” addict. Is it the same with alcohlism. Once you’re an alcoholic: you are always one & a sober alcoholic is still a recovering one. I know a lot about addiction since it runs on both sides of my family but I am looking for any outside input, feedback, or experiences IF you feel comfortable sharing them.
Was I wrong not to feel that much sadness when he passed? I knew it was coming it just happened so fast. He wasn’t much of a dad: he rarely paid child support & I won’t ramble on how he cheated on my mom & stayed out drinking sometimes all night. My 2 questions would be “Once an alcoholic always an alcoholic” correct & Am I a bad person for not feeling that sad when he passed? Someone needs to correct my former pastor & tell he’s STILL an alcoholic: but a recovering one. I apologize for being long-winded. It’s part of MY disorder.
I mean to say you’re still an alcoholic just a RECOVERING one. I’d appreciate answers from more mature people. I’m 26 not 16 & could use some feed back from some in or CLOSE to my age group/bracket!    Read more...